When we are stuck in blame or resentment we are in a trance – the other person becomes an unreal bad other, and our own sense of being contracts into a victimized self, an angry self, a righteous self. Using the acronym RAIN, this practice guides us in bringing mindfulness and compassion to our inner experience, and then to viewing the other with a more open and clear heart. By awakening from the trance of blame, we are able to respond with intelligence and care to the unmet needs that underlie all conflict.
From the conclusion of Belonging to Each Other – Part 2. Listen to the full talk here.